A problem does not need to be eliminated to be resolved. Often a better solution is a change in viewpoint. When you are no longer affected by a problem, you no longer have a problem, although nothing may have outwardly changed.

If you get upset when someone verbally berates you, it is because you cannot separate things in an enlightened way. It is not what someone says or does to you, short of physical violence that affects you - only your thoughts about what they say affect you. Why allow another's lack of balance to affect yours! Why allow another's problem to create a problem within you? By accepting what they do, you only hurt yourself.

Let's say the person closest to you is often warm and loving, and you enjoy these times, but this person can also be selfish and self-centered. During those times, you consciously detach and let the negativity flow through you without affecting you. It is that person's right to be grouchy, and it is your right not to be affected. Nothing about the situation has changed except the way you view it.